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hello and welcome to Life Wih Francy Podcast a place where you can find all

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kinds of conversation like mental health self-love self-care trauma hobbies and

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more with this podcast I want to create a community where we support one another in business and personal life hope you

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enjoyed this episode now let's get the show started on today's episode I have

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the pleasure to talk to Fatima Bay who is a mind shift coach and the host of

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the main shift power podcast she uses her inspirational passion and witty

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personality to bring together teens and the adults who work with them with raw

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honest and meaningful conversation this is an amazing collaboration happened because of the woman in podcasting

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Community where Jennifer Hensel has created a great place where women support one another now let's welcome

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Fatima to the show tell us what it's like with you yeah what is life with me

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um not boring I'm always full of energy

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um I am you know very deep and serious person um but at the same time I'm a giant kid

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I'm a giant goofball so people who know me know that I am I'm really just crazy

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in a fun good way um but I'm also very deep and serious when when it needs to be in both

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personalities will come out you know in different situations um but life with me is very busy

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uh first I'm actually a dual entrepreneur so what that means is I have two businesses the first business

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which I started way back in 2010 is I'm a professional seamstress uh dressmaker and designer I specialize in wedding

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gowns so I'm making design wedding gowns I won uh National and international

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awards for it um several which is I'm I'm proud to say

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I don't say it with arrogance I say it with a lot of Pride because I work my ass off can I say ass on here yeah

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you're right I forgot to ask you that um I you know I worked my behind off to

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be able to say those things so um I do that um and then I have then I started the

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Mind Shifter uh just a couple years ago I have uh been a mind shift coach

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honestly unofficially all my life because people have people naturally gravitate to me for advice people

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naturally gravitate to me to confide in me about some pretty deep serious things

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some pretty vulnerable things really um and I'm you know I'm fine with that I've always been that person and I find

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myself giving people words of wisdom seeing situations angles I would say of a situation that uh or perspectives that

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other people don't and you know after a while I learned that that's actually a gift and um you know something I know is that

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none of our gifts are for us none of our none not a single one of us are gifted

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to entertain ourselves all of our gifts are there for everyone else

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and everything that we're enjoying in life is because of someone else's gift and so you know recognizing that and

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understanding um my purpose uh my specific purpose I don't mean

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General yeah I'm here to make everybody happy that's not your purpose my purpose is to make a difference in the world and

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especially with youth um I don't only work with youth because a lot of adults gravitate towards me too

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but my biggest passion is with youth and I know that my purpose is to make a difference for them and by making a

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difference for the next generation and making a difference in the world because the difference I make in the youth will

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go on and you know and we'll go on for decades and um so I think it's important

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to sow my seeds where they're going to grow the most and that's in our youth

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I love that and that's why I like my heart like what's attached to yours because I feel it's so small for

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teenagers just because I was a hardcore teenager that my mom didn't understand

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so she like pretty much gave me away you know in in a sense just to my biological

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father and then he didn't know what to do with a teenager because he was like Hey here he's your daughter she's 15 now

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do your thing so anyways but yeah how did your mission started and

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um yeah tell us more about your mission well it's it started

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um as far as being the mine shifter that's a different answer than the podcast but I'll tell you both as far as

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being the Mind Shifter that really started as a push for my sister

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um my sister is uh Monica Bay the Healer and heels if you Google her she's a big

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deal um she has her own TV Network and she's a black woman in America with her own TV

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Network ain't but a few of them her Oprah and just like one or two others that I could that I could find when I researched him so

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um she you know she's not new to podcasting and public speaking and you

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know networking and Etc et cetera she knows me and she knows how strong I am and my passions Etc and also knows my

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giftings and she's like you really need to be you need to just you need to officially become a coach and I just

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hadn't really considered it until she pushed me and when she pushed me I'm like yeah I've been holding back these

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gifts and I need to just go forward and help more people with them so I always knew I wanted to do that one

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day I just wasn't sure how but she pushed me with the how and and it just kind of

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uh snowballs from there and so recently

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I'll tell you I'll tell you this there was a group that I started in Amsterdam New York at a

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at creative connection Clubhouse they are a community center um a really really really good Community

6:02

Center in Amsterdam and I say that because there's a lot of community centers um in the country and not all of them

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are actually connected to their Community you know what I'm saying yeah so uh this one actually is and so I

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started doing a girls group there as the Mind Shifter called blossoms and it was just simply a group for teenage girls to

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come and uh talk have a place where they could talk but

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it could be honest where nobody's gonna politically correct them they can just speak and then but not just sit there

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and complain but also come up with their own Solutions because you're not gonna complain to me for an hour and not and

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not and just leave it there no we're gonna come up with Solutions too the complaining is necessary yeah talk is

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necessary but solution being solution oriented is also necessary so I started doing that and then I met a girl in that

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group she was in the very first group uh the very first uh session of that group

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and then she just stuck with the group and then she stuck with me um

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she is going to be on my next episode this coming Tuesday and talk she's going

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to talk about that Journey but working with her and and I you know ended up coaching her that wasn't the intention

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but I just I ended up coaching her and within a few months she went from low

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self-esteem to you know and know value in herself and no vision for her future to now

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she's looking for scholarships for college she's going to be a lawyer she knows exactly what kind of lawyer she's

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going to be uh she's very confident now she knows exactly who she is and

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um you know if other people says say otherwise she's like oh well they're wrong she doesn't take it you know

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um but being able to do that for her made me recognize that I want to be able to do that for more more girls like her

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um on on a bigger scale and and in boys too if they're willing boys you have to operate with boys a little bit different

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a girl so that's why I say girls because um that's just where my specialty is although I love young men

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um but I uh I recognize that and then I

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recognize that there because of that group I recognize there needs to be a

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space where teenagers of all backgrounds I don't care where

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rich poor white black blah blah blah blah all backgrounds there needs to be a space where they can

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actually have real honest conversation without the of extreme

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political correctness because that's a society they're growing up in right now and without real raw honest conversation

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there's absolutely no solutions that can come that is 100 True in any part of

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life not just with teenagers you cannot come up with Solutions if you don't have

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honest conversation first and the honest conversation may look different for different people in

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different places and different settings but the honest communication has to happen first well if you're constantly

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told to focus on what you can't say instead of what you can that's a problem

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and we have a generation right now that is growing up that doesn't know how to freaking have a conversation that's

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productive they know how to have a conversation that's safe but not one

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that's actually productive and that's a problem for this whole

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country because they're the ones who are going to be running this place in a few years and if they can't have productive

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conversations now what the hell is it going to look like in a few years yeah it's good it's scary though

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really and I I wanted to create a space where they could actually talk

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um and a lot of it is receiving encouragement because something I do notice and and you can research it on

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Google and find that facts and figures will agree but even without looking at facts and figures I could just see around me

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our teenagers this this generation are growing up

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more lonely than any other generation that we've ever that's ever been here honestly even back before electricity

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I'm sure those kids were not as lonely as they are now because there was a family to focus on

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but now we're focused on self and self self self and self self self all the time and there's nothing wrong with

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focusing on self if you do it with balance but we don't as a culture that's not what we teach

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anyway there's people who do but as a culture we're taught um to be self-centered and and I mean as

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an American culture specifically we're taught to be extremely self-centered it's very out of balance and it's very bad

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um it produces a lot of bad things um and our generation is feeling very lonely you know our younger generation

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they're all feeling very lonely they have all the they have all these digital connections

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but not a whole lot of human connections and it really is true that a lot of these teenagers and I go and I teach at

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high schools I do well I speak and like do workshops and such at high schools and so I I work a lot with high school

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students and I see high school students all the time and it really is true that they don't know how to talk to each

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other sometimes it also depends on how school they grow up in of course because some people do but generally speaking as as a

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generation they don't know how to talk to each other and as adults we take we just kind of don't think it's

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as big of a deal as it is but it's a really big deal because if they don't know how to talk to each other how are

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they going to produce anything like what are they going to produce and it's not that they're incapable of

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producing they're being taught to be robots instead of productive I'll say that again our generation is

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being taught to be robots instead of being productive that's a problem

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and I want to combat that problem I want to do something about it you know I can't solve every problem in the world but I can solve something yeah and so

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I'm using my podcast to do that we can all do something from where we are and where I am is I have a mouth

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I have an attitude and I have a strong personality so I'm taking all those three things [Laughter]

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determination putting them together in a way you know so that

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um we can I can help the World by helping the Next Generation that's going to run it

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yeah I love it and that was a great segue to how the podcast started

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um the the podcast is is I'm very passionate about anybody who has talked

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to me about it is like I was like and I even say to them like you can hear my passion right you're like yeah

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yeah I'm very passionate about it it's just it's because I I love I love children I have on my entire life I used

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to teach Sunday school I used to work at Job Corps I ran the dorm sometimes I ran the whole Center sometimes

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um there's a there's a lot of different capacities um I've done youth groups I've been

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youth coordinator there's a lot of different capacities in which I have worked with youth

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it's because I love Youth and they're so important to me um and I'm not going to talk about as

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much but one of the things that I'm also known for by people that know me is I'm very very passionate about human

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trafficking why because I'm passionate about Youth and it's the number one or it might be

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number two number one and number two they switch up between hunger and trafficking for issues among young women

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and children in the world yeah so I I'm very passionate about that I raise money for I have raised money for that I

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donate to an organization it helps with that um for the same reason I care about youth so this podcast started because I care

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about Youth and I and I and I care about the future and I see um the crap that are that adults that we

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have left them we've left them with a bowl of and then expect them to make a cake with it like that's that's

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how I feel yeah that we have in this country I I can only talk about America because that's where I am in different

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parts of the world is different but in America um that's that's where we are and so I

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want to do something to to really just be able to help them and another you

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know another big part of it as I stated earlier is a lot of Youth are feeling lonely and they really think that their

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issues are just theirs alone and they're not you know they think that

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they're weird and they're not you know they think they're stupid and they're not because they don't fit into this

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stupid little box that our society says you're supposed to fit in they think that there's something wrong with them

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and ninety percent of the time there isn't sometimes yeah the right there is some room but most of the time

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there isn't and they and and I want to be able to tell them that you know that you're you're not weird you are

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different than your peers and you're designed that way go with what you're designed to do not

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with the Box we try to put you in and so that's another objective um of my show as well

15:08

I love it so is it like just you or do you bring guests oh a guess

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um I sometimes it will be just me but very rarely um I don't want people to just hear my

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voice all the time because I'm sorry I don't care how much you might love me you don't get annoying after a while

15:24

I get the feeling you know what I mean so I um I will have guests most of the

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time um and at least 60 of the time my guess will be

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teenagers there will be a lot of episodes where I have a teenagers and adults discussing

15:43

things oh I love that I gotta check it out yeah yeah you do especially uh

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this coming Tuesday is the young girl that I told you well this is gonna be posted in oh I forgot yeah so it's gonna

15:56

be already live

16:03

uh what did they title it real change episode yeah the name of the episode is

16:09

real change so uh you want to listen to her because she's the one that I've coached and she's just in a matter of

16:14

months become a completely different person in a good way um and and has a strong future ahead of

16:20

her and has a plan to maintain that strong future not just thinking about it and hoping for it but a plan

16:27

um and uh and then there's you know so so the episodes are a little bit different some episodes have just me and

16:34

an adult talking some are just me and a youth talking uh some are you know I'm the

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host and I stay in the background and the the you know the adult who's in a particular position

16:46

will have a discussion with a youth and they can ask all the questions they want and and again on my show there's there's

16:52

I do not bow down to political correctness and this is something I say to every adult and every every youth on

16:57

my show you can say whatever you want as long as you're not rude and obnoxious that's the only thing I ask if you feel

17:02

I don't care if it's politically or correct or not if you feel like someone's then say they're yes this political incorrect to

17:09

say that but I want you to be free to say that now most people I know actually don't use that word but I'm just saying

17:14

yeah then I'm just saying they're free to say whatever they want as long as it's real and true

17:20

I love it and with your coaching do you do a one-on-one or do you go to a group

17:26

setting I do both um this coming fall I I will start doing

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virtual group settings because I've done group settings but not uh not virtually uh so this fall they will be on my

17:38

website so I'm assuming the website will be on your your uh show notes yeah the show

17:45

notes so uh if you go to my website everything I have coming up will be on my events page but I do one-on-one

17:51

coaching and that's also on my website um they can contact me to find out what kind of coaching you need

17:58

um what I what I do that's different than other coaches I don't have uh

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preset packages rigidly so I do have uh

18:08

categories that I focus on but I don't have preset packages like this much for that five weeks this one for this week's

18:14

because I've learned that that doesn't work for everyone and I want to work for everyone that I work with so for me I I

18:21

set up the packages according to what their needs are and the subjects that I focus on that I can help them with

18:28

um that we can find a way to because maybe I focus on you know three or four different things and maybe you need two

18:35

of those so this one package is not going to be enough and let's just put them together and let's go instead of

18:41

six weeks to school ten weeks or ten months you know whatever you need um and I work with people because I believe

18:47

you're customizing what I do just like when I do wedding nails I customize what I do with those two

18:53

um I love it I I think it's important cookie cutter and I gotta say this

18:58

cookie cutter mentality cookie cutterness works for cookies it

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doesn't work for humans yeah so I don't take a cookie cutter or approach anything that I do

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um you know but if people talk to me and they want specifics I'll give them specifics in that conversation um but I don't like do oh a five-week

19:17

package a six weeks package a six month package you know I just I find that that's not as useful for people

19:24

um because a lot of people don't fit into the the categories we want them to and I believe in meeting people where

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they are so I meet you where you are and take you where you want to go that might be 10 weeks it might be 10 months you

19:37

know it depends on how far you want to go and where you are yeah I love that is there anything else that you would like

19:43

my listeners to know about you or your mission uh yes so I'm also a business with a

19:48

cause um I donate a portion of all of my

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proceeds um to an organization called kinship United and I absolutely love them I've

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been donating I've been donating to them since I started my my average eye my sewing business in 2010 so a long time

20:06

now um and what they do is they help orphans and um and human trafficking victims their

20:13

focus is not human trafficking but they do tend to um focus on areas where where children are

20:21

targeted for human trafficking so that's why I include that and when I describe it so they I love them though because

20:27

they help the whole child so they'll take them out of a bad

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situation they'll take them off the streets where they're usually picked up and kidnapped um by traffickers and then they will

20:39

give them food and shelter that's just where they begin they're a Christian organizations so they help them

20:45

spiritually they give them counseling they help them with education they even help them with career choices and

20:51

advancement in some areas now that looks different in all the different countries that they're in but um

20:58

but they they really help so anyway I'm a business with a cause any business that I own and I mean any business I own

21:04

have owned or will own um that's a part of my my business model is that I donate a portion to help

21:11

children around the world and I always will what's the point of having status money and anything else if you don't do

21:17

something with it yeah you can buy fancy cars and and and have everybody like you yay put you on a pedestal blah blah blah

21:23

but then what else so what like what so that's my business model so as I grow so

21:29

do my donations um and that's that's really how I keep it uh the other thing that I want people

21:35

to know is that I mentioned that I coach but I didn't say what my focuses are so my focuses are to help people to find

21:41

their individual purpose uh which I did with that young girl um the real change uh episode you'll

21:48

hear about help people to find their individual purpose um

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to once you find your purpose turn that purpose into a business or career not

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you know I'm big on entrepreneur you know entrepreneurship but everybody's not going to be an entrepreneur and I

22:06

know that but you still can take your your gifts and your purpose and make money with them while you're enjoying

22:12

being fulfilled why in the world are you just working a job to pay bills that's why so many

22:19

people are are just miserable because they're doing that um we got to pay bills and we need money

22:24

but you also need to feel fulfilled and why not have it an all-in-one package so

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I do that and then helping people to find balance balance is a huge subject of mine

22:35

um and I don't mean in the way that people normally teach it balance is not 50 50. balance is something that works

22:41

everything in life that works has balance and everything that doesn't is because something's out of balance most

22:47

people don't think about it that way but it's true and I help people to find their balance in an area of their life

22:54

where they're going too far so people that are what I call mental extremists

23:00

um they go way off the deep end you know in in one area

23:07

um those are people who need balance something that needs balance right now for example in our society is politics

23:13

biggest freaking example Ever every you know it's like most it's like a lot of people if they're a Democrat they're way

23:20

off the deep end air-headed and everything's free including the air in my head and then you have the other

23:27

extremists on um on the Republican side who are just like we're not racist we just hate everybody who's not like us

23:34

um you know and you have these extremities in both parties that have taken them over when in fact there are a

23:41

lot of people in both parties who are not extremists like that but they're out of balance they're way off the deep end

23:47

and people think that because if you're not at zero you have to be a hundred no

23:53

there are 99 freaking numbers in between maybe you should be a 67 or 42.3 you

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know it's like do you want to go from one extreme to another because they don't understand balance so I help

24:06

people to understand balance first of all and then understand how they can find balance in their personal life

24:13

because most of us have are imbalanced in our lives in different places in different

24:19

ways and sometimes it's just not a matter of okay you talk too much for example that doesn't mean that you should shut

24:24

up it means that you need to learn when to talk too much

24:30

oh my God that's a hard one for me I feel

24:38

me as they say I'm very friendly I'm very outgoing I talk a lot um that's my personality but if when

24:46

when people don't understand that that's a natural part of who you are and they're not like that they want you to

24:52

shut up you know you don't need to shut up you just need to learn when it's appropriate to use your gift there's a

24:58

difference and that's that's part of the balances that I teach people how to do I love that any advice for any quick uh

25:07

mind shift um I'm pretty sure I just did some mind shifting during this this interview but

25:14

but because I can't help it I do it all the time um but number one if you really want your

25:20

mind to be shifted um go to my YouTube channel I have a YouTube channel it's the mindset I'll

25:26

send that to you as well um it's the Mind Shifter and I have a I

25:32

have over 70 videos on there um and a lot of them are I used to be on the radio local radio and I had uh My

25:38

Mind Shifter segment and um I would just give advice and just talk about things

25:44

of life that we all deal with uh and can you know a lot of people can relate to and

25:50

um there's a lot of good lessons on there so I would suggest that you go to my

25:55

um my my YouTube channel to see what I have to say and obviously subscribe to my my podcast duh yeah yeah

26:03

I'm a listener even though it's important I'm sorry go ahead no yeah uh

26:09

the uh to start giving the links of website podcasts anything that you want

26:14

to promo okay um for for the for the podcast if you go

26:19

to Fatima Bay f-a-t-i-m-a-b-e-y.com slash podcast

26:26

um everything you need to know about the show is on that page all the links related to so if you have any topics

26:32

that you think should be talked about submit so you can submit them right on that page if you have any comments about the podcast you can submit them right on

26:38

that page if you want to be a guest on the podcast you can click on a little button on that page

26:44

um and go right to a form to fill out that gets them they put you in front of my face

26:50

um there's also my website fatimabay.com all of my coaching information

26:57

um I also go to high schools and do workshops if anybody's interested in me doing those I have a few workshops

27:03

coming up this uh this fall about that focuses on helping teens to find their

27:09

careers um something I've noticed is that schools are usually very good at giving

27:14

them tools but not always so good at preparing them for those tools that's where I come in and help to prepare the

27:21

teams for the tools that the schools are already giving them so that when they're making those career choices which are

27:27

really pivotal points in their lives uh they're going to college they're going to a gap year program they're going to a

27:33

trade school they're going right into an entrepreneurship whatever that teen is doing that decision needs to be made

27:40

um from the heart not just from information and schools are very good at giving them

27:46

information and giving them tools but not always making sure they're prepared to make the right decision

27:51

I come in and do that because I don't work for the school so I can come in and say what I want and be honest and be

27:57

real um well say what I want within reason I don't do anything crazy but

28:02

sometimes people take things to extreme so that's why I feel the need to to balance that out when I say it

28:08

um so I I go in and because I'm not on the restrictions that the teachers are on and that the staff is on I can come

28:15

in and be real and honest with the students and be productive with them so that when the teacher and staff and counselors and and those who work very

28:21

hard at schools are are able to you know give them the tools um and show them what websites to go to

28:28

or just all these different tools that they give them those tools are far more useful because now you have a student

28:33

who's prepared to use them properly and the problem is a lot of them are given these students tools who are not

28:41

prepared to use them properly because they still have no clue what they want to do and it doesn't mean that they're going to have a there doesn't mean that

28:47

they're going to be perfectly on point after talking to me but I could at least give them the guidance on how to find

28:53

that point I love that well thank you so much for coming on my show oh I forgot to say IG

29:01

I'm Fatima dot Bay underscore I believe I will have all the links in the show

29:07

notes sorry your podcast and your website it

29:13

will all be on the show notes I promise oh and one more thing um even though the the podcast is for teens

29:21

I'm finding that a lot of adults are going to get something out of it too even though this discussion is for teens

29:28

there's a whole lot of adults who are just grown up teens yeah some you know that they're not like

29:34

some uh that are not self-aware so like when they hear something talking to a

29:40

kid you're like oh man I wish somebody would have talked to me like that yes oh

29:45

my God they can relate and stuff like that because there's a lot of I'm one of them I'm like I'm working on my healing

29:51

it's one day at a time and that's why I love um taking care of the youth kids and

29:59

teenagers but teenagers have like a slow spot because once again I was a hard teenager that was misunderstood and I

30:07

wish I just had the tools and resources to be able to express myself on all the

30:13

big emotions that you're feeling you know yeah so when I have somebody that has that passion as well it's like yes

30:21

girl do your thing your world needs you know the world needs you so thank you

30:27

for what you do thank you for having me

30:32

well thank you so much for listening to another episode you can find uh my show

30:38

and all major podcast platforms as well as my YouTube channel if you enjoyed

30:43

this kind of content don't forget to like And subscribe on YouTube and follow on your favorite podcast app uh you can

30:51

leave a review to help others find the show it sure helps and is truly appreciated hope you have a blessed day

30:58

bye bye